Who Am I?

My name is irrelevant. My jokes are corny, old, bizarre, and just plain hard to get. That is why if something seems unusual about me, it’s probably a joke. I’m incredibly talkative, so if you want to talk to me, feel free to say something. I will try to help or give advice in the best way I can. And if you have a personal question that may seem a little…off or like it would offend me, go ahead and ask. I’m pretty hard to offend. Just don’t ask me about Dorothy, The Wizard of Oz, or Tornadoes.

The Name?

(for the insecure males out there, please skip to next section)

For those of you pervs out there, it is a reference to my last name. Not size (that came later). Woolly mammoth. Nothing more….well, the 61 is my Football number. But you don’t need to know that. You just should know why I chose the name mammoth as opposed to something obnoxious…like IlovepuppiesGivemepuppiesLookatmyincrediblylongandobnoxiousname. I could have done that, but I didn’t.

Favorite Stuff/Fun Facts?

Athletics: Tennis, Snowboarding, My Girlfriend (when not on the market), Weight lifting, Football, Camping (like those annoying snipers on MW2, except with a machine gun).
Freetime: Kongregate, Facebook, My Blue Epiphone Les Paul, Clubbin (seals, not dancing, you sickos), Party.
Foods: Meat, More Meat, Steak, Lots of Meat, A Plethora of Meat, Oreos, The Seven Basic Food Groups (Lard, Salt, Sugar, Meat, Chips, Pizza, and Meat), NOT FISH, and Chicken.
Jobs: Tennis Desk Attendant (turned ball machine on high during a tournament), Farm Hand (tipped a cow…2 cows…a whole herd), Undercover FBI Agent…I mean Bakery Assistant (“burned” a few too many “cakes”), Student (didn’t drink enough beer, do enough pot, or accumulate fungi).
Music: Rock, Rap, Soundtrack, Howling Cats, NOT COUNTRY, NOT POLKA, and Alternative (that doesn’t sound like emos).

References:

Wikipedia (It is a legit source. Just cite it on your next major paper and find out).
Kongregate (for when you are done creeping on me).
Facebook (if you aren’t done creeping on me, try to find me).