hmp511

Currently residing within the Evil Popcorn Death Whale of the northern seas, hmp makes a living salvaging small pieces of cardboard and sometimes even actual pieces of wood from other consumed artifacts of misfortune. As a result of this lifestyle, his bad luck ratio estimate has not too long ago entered the region of “Curesed for life”. He is, however, fortunate to have lived even this long. Most creatures would be long dead if they resided in the death whale for such an amount of time. This is not to mention that this is the Death Whale of Evil Popcorn, which can be described more accurately as being like razor blades than being like popcorn (even if they’re salted with butter on them). The secret to his success here, is his body’s composition. He is 38% authentic hemp blankets which, when digested, creates a horrible alergic reaction for any unsuspecting Death Whale. Death Whales are known to have very good control over their organ systems and, as such, can specifically avoid actually digesting an object even after ingesting it. On the weekends, hmp holds small rave parties inside the whale’s esophagus and may even step outside for an actual bite to eat as apposed to his usual nutritional methods of absorbing semi-edible substances into the sponge-like fibers of his blankety skin. Nobody knows what he does with the rest of his time, aside from collecting his scraps of salvaged carboard. It is not even known what the carboard is intended for. Rumors do exist but they have been discredited as only 74% accurate, which is simply not acceptable. Some of my best friends include:a ferret, a button, a bowl of Kibble(see also Tibbles), a Time Lord, a piece of cabbage and many others.

It’s been 5 years since I first joined Kongregate and I’ve made many friends and many memories. The Time Machine will always live on in the memories of those you never could find the way out.