Shatman's Comments

I have no idea what everyone's talking about. It's truly an artistic tour-de-force. 5/5, hoping for console release.

This is what happens when your time-travel facility is not OSHA compliant!

"Over time, however, the rocky creature blocking the magma deep underground within the volcano led to a massive buildup of pressure, changing what would have been a simple overflow eruption which would give fertile new soil into a massive explosion that could be heard around the world. Such was the fate of the people of Krakatoa." In all seriousness, I think this is the best puzzle game I've played in a long time.

Game Serving as a Pretentious Metaphor for Chasing a Woman, Episode It's Been Done So Much Better With A Less Annoying Gimmick.

Died between two hills. Hilarity ensued.

"Siegemaster! Come forth!" "Yes my liege?" "It is time we destroy our enemies!" "Of course, sire. I shall set out with the men, and we shall begin constructing enough cannons to volley-" "No." "Come again?" "You shall destroy all of the enemies castles. However, you must do this without killing A SINGLE ONE OF OUR MULTICULTURAL CITIZENS and with under three cannonballs." "But, sire! Three cannonballs is not enough to demolish a house, let alone a castle!" "Ugh, fine pansy. We'll let you use FOUR on some houses. But if you can't demolish them in three shots, you have to help the enemy rebuild." "But sire, that's tactical suicide!"

Word of advice: Swifness makes it impossible to fall down small holes.

This is the only game I've ever found claiming to be original that actually delivered.

Hindu is not a word, apparently. I'll inform the late Ghandi.

apparently "Snail", "brick", "theologian", and "pants" are not valid words.

Paper + Fire: Nothing interesting. Gunpowder + Lighter: Nothing interesting. Knife and Self: Nothing interesting. Knife and Lilith: Nothing interesting.

Stuck in a wall. I still love this game.

Yes, soldiers. I want you to ignore that rocket sentry that just blew up both our tanks so you can shoot a Light unit.

I'm having trouble beating the Dictator Chimera. Whenever I slide under Hitler's head, Stalin's slams down, knocking me into Caligula, who throws me up to Papa Doc. Any suggestions?

Okay, why did you use that stupid blood splatter/fade-in text when a simple text box would work just as well, and not destroy a computer's framerate?

Not so much a "leap forward" as "Jumping up and down on the same concept until it dies."

1. Smash turtle 2. ??? 3. Profit. 4. Go to store 5. buy things 6. Smash more turtles 7. ??? 8. More profit! 9. Go to 5.

The first level is the Brackenwood theme, right? Great game- I'm not very good at it, but it's a great concept.